Watches, Explained: Every Brand as a Car

Most men don't know much about watches. Almost all of them know something about cars. That's the idea behind one of John LeFevre's most-saved posts.

In May 2024 he posted "Watches, explained," a list mapping 16 watch brands to the car brands that play the same role. It was viewed more than 4.4 million times and bookmarked nearly 17,000 times. Five days later he followed it with "Watches, a guide," a chart that sorted the brands by money and by personality, and that one passed five million views.

Below are all 16 pairings, exactly as John posted them, grouped by where they sit in the market. The commentary is ours.

Why watches matter

John made the case years earlier, in a 2015 piece for Business Insider written as GSElevator, "A Wall Street guide to watches":

"Watches matter, especially on Wall Street. Even if you don’t care about watches, it’s important to care about watches. It’s often the first thing someone will use to size you up."

He's right, and not only on Wall Street. A watch is one of the few things a man wears that is chosen entirely by him. A suit can be a uniform. A watch never is. That's why people read it.

The top of the market

• Patek Philippe -> Rolls Royce
• Vacheron Constantin -> Porsche
• Audemars Piguet -> Ferrari
• Cartier -> Bentley
• Jaeger‑LeCoultre -> Aston Martin
• Richard Mille -> McLaren

These are the pairings with the most to say. Patek Philippe as Rolls-Royce is the obvious one: the brand everyone agrees sits at the top. Vacheron Constantin as Porsche is clever, the connoisseur's choice that people outside the hobby underrate. Audemars Piguet as Ferrari fits a brand whose signature model is instantly recognizable from across a room.

Cartier as Bentley is a reminder that Cartier is a jeweler first. Jaeger-LeCoultre as Aston Martin gets the British-elegance-meets-engineering feel right. And Richard Mille as McLaren is close to literal; Richard Mille has partnered with McLaren in Formula 1.

The workhorses

• Rolex -> Mercedes Benz
• Omega -> Audi
• IWC -> BMW
• Breitling -> Lexus
• Tag Heuer -> Cadillac

This is where most men who buy a serious watch end up, and the car comparisons are spot on. Rolex and Mercedes are the default luxury choice: excellent, recognized everywhere, and never a risk. Omega and Audi are the strong alternative for someone who wants quality without the most obvious badge. IWC and BMW are for the man who cares about engineering.

It's worth noting how John's view of Rolex has shifted. In 2015 he wrote:

"To some extent, wearing a Rolex is like driving a BMW 3-series. It says you've got a little bit of money, but nothing interesting to say. It’s a safe, entry-level choice."

By 2024, Rolex had been promoted to Mercedes. Even in 2015, he noted that for the most sought-after Rolex, the stainless steel Daytona, "since there’s a waiting list, the real status symbol is paying retail for it."

The loud ones

• Hublot -> Lamborghini
• Panerai -> Land Rover

Hublot as Lamborghini is the sharpest pairing on the list. Both are built to be noticed, and both are more about the statement than the substance. Panerai as Land Rover fits too: a rugged, oversized tool designed for adventure, mostly worn by men in offices.

The everyday brands

• Casio -> Honda
• Seiko -> Toyota
• Apple -> Tesla

Casio as Honda and Seiko as Toyota are compliments, not insults. Both are reliable, well made and honest about what they are. There's no shame in either, and on the chart John posted later, both sit firmly in the "fun to be around" half.

Apple as Tesla is the modern pairing: a tech company that walked into an old industry and changed it. It's a computer on your wrist, not a watch in the traditional sense, which is exactly why the comparison works.

The chart: who's fun, who's insufferable

John's follow-up, "Watches, a guide," was a single image with two axes. Left to right runs "Has no money" to "Has money." Bottom to top runs "Insufferable" to "Fun to be around."

As we read the chart, the brands land like this:

• Has money, fun to be around: Richard Mille, Patek Philippe, Rolex, Jaeger-LeCoultre, Vacheron Constantin, A. Lange & Söhne, Blancpain, Audemars Piguet and Breitling.
• Has money, insufferable: Cartier, Omega, IWC, Panerai, Hublot and, at the far corner, Jacob & Co.
• No money, fun to be around: Casio, Seiko, Swatch, Garmin and Longines.
• No money, insufferable: Shinola, Tag Heuer, Tissot, Tudor, Baume & Mercier, Movado and Fossil.

Apple sits dead center. And at the very top of the chart, above every brand, is the most fun option of all: "Doesn't wear a watch."

That last one is the punchline, and John made the same point in 2015:

"The power move is to have a few watches stuffed away at home, and then, rarely, if ever, wear one."

How to use this

If you're buying your first good watch, the list is a shortcut. Decide what kind of car you'd want to be seen in, then look at the matching watch. If you'd drive a Mercedes, look at Rolex. If you'd rather drive an Audi or a BMW, look at Omega or IWC. If you'd drive a Toyota and never think about it again, a Seiko is a perfectly respectable answer.

And if you're tempted by the Lamborghini of watches, remember what John wrote about watches in general:

"Wearing a watch is more about conveying a message than it is about telling time."

Decide what message you're sending before you buy.

Sources: John LeFevre, "Watches, explained," X, May 2024; "Watches, a guide," X, May 2024; GSElevator, "A Wall Street guide to watches," Business Insider, August 2015.